Or, one or two people I know have been doing a lot of web searches while traveling!
Google has provided access to its trends data. OK. That’s cool. What do I spy with my little eye? Well, I wondered who has been searching for porn. In particular, the search phrase xxx.
Hm. It looks like porn is on the rise in 2006. That’s good news if you like to get nekkid. Now, those little letters are not, like you might expect, dates that Paris Hilton decided to get nekkid herself in some public place, or when Brittany decided to get some surgery done. Instead, they’re news events that GoogleBot has decided are important.
But here’s the thing that really matters. You see, the US government is tasking the FBI on searching out and destroying porn. Not the bad, illegal stuff involving kids and whatnot, but just good-old-fashioned naked people doin’ the nasty. Well, something like that. I don’t “do the nasty,” myself… I just make sweet, sweet love… when I happen to be in the same place as my wife, anyway.
I had a point there about the FBI, but I forget what it was. I hope this isn’t getting too personal… I asked if I should quit blogging, you know.
So, let’s see who the dirty people are:
Foreigners! I knew it! Look at that! South America has five cities on the list: Santiago, Mexico City, Lima, Buenos Ares, Bogota, Caracas, and Montreal. OK, so Montreal isn’t in South America, but it’s things like the Mexican-Canadian Overpass that gets me all riled up, so they’re in with the rest of the dirty porn people. That, and Canada has a band called Barenaked Ladies! It does not get more pornographic than that, I tell you. Well, the Ohio Players had some rather risque record covers back in the day, but that doesn’t count. Vinyl is kinky, not dirty.
…
You know, there’s a lot of places in South America I’ve always wanted to visit. I’m sure I’ve blogged about that before… Good, wholesome people down there. They know how to kick back and have a good time. Real relaxed-like.
THIS POST WAS BROUGHT TO YOU BY ME BEING BORED OF PRODUCTIVITY AND GOOGLE TRENDS
PS. I’d like to point out that, most of the time, I’m a foreigner. Therefore, it is eye-ronic when I say it. Like the song. You know, “doncha’ think?”
PPS. I’ve been knocking things off my to-do list all day, the day started at 5AM, and I’m catching a bus to Chicago at Midnight. It’s going to be a long, long day. Call this my humour/sanity break for the day, eh?